


$500 Fine for Littering

by Duchesse



Category: Devil May Cry
Genre: F/M, Humor, Karma - Freeform, M/M, Mild Language, Reader-Insert, Reader-Interactive, Self-Insert, gender-neutral, nero bein a lil sit and mc not taking it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-19
Updated: 2018-07-19
Packaged: 2019-06-12 19:53:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 820
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15347466
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Duchesse/pseuds/Duchesse
Summary: Someone has to stand up for the environment, and luckily Nico records it all.[Nero | Reader].





	$500 Fine for Littering

**Author's Note:**

> i am sooooo stoked for dmc5 next spring!

“So, it was a huge pain in the ass to get into the surveillance cameras around Red Grave. Like, the demons basically totaled a good eighty percent of them. But, did I let that stop me?  _Hah_! No way!”

You closed your laptop with a triumphant snap, feigning ignorance as Nero rolled his eyes and busied himself with polishing off his fourth energy drink. His chest gave a jolt as he quashed a belch behind his hand, making you question whether he had heard your flagrant display of hacking prowess at all.

Nico gave an heavy exhale through her nostrils, blowing cigarette smoke with it as she hunched forward over her phone screen. She sat on the edge of the driver’s seat, heels of her boots bouncing against the single step leading into the van.

“Good work, honey.” She flashed you a charming smile, nail flicking the filter of her cigarette to knock off the ashes. “Think it’ll be enough to track down the dirty dog causing everyone so much grief, though?”

In your act of vengeance, you swung the side-door on the van open towards Nero, barely masking your sneer as he leaned away. “Whoops,  _sorry_. And I dunno, Nico. That cum-dumpster is good at hiding his tracks. But, it’s a start.”

“Well then,” Nero started, voice far more excitable than it was mere minutes ago. “What are we waiting for? Let’s hunt down that piece of shit and close down his operation.”

You opened your mouth to agree, yet the words lodged into your throat the moment you saw Nero fling the empty can over his shoulder. It landed with a nasty clamor, rattling like a chorus inside your head. For a moment, you couldn’t muster yourself to do anything, whereas Nico slowly snuffed her cigarette on the sole of her boot and brought up the camera on her phone.

“There’s a five-hundred dollar littering fine, Nero.” You tossed your laptop inside the van, palm resting flat when the door slammed shut, eyes thinning towards him. “Pick it up.”

“Huh? What? Come on, it’s just a can.” Nero offered dismissively, cuffing the sleeve of his coat a little higher as he fixed to turn the corner to go around to the passenger seat. “Get in the van and let’s move.”

You were tempted to boot the aluminum straight into his skull. “Nero. Pick up the fucking can. There’s a trashcan literally  _right there_.”

Tension set in Nero’s jaw, you finally managed to get his attention. He whisked his thumb beneath is nose, sauntering up to you as he passed a glance to the empty container. “Why are you making it a big deal? It’s a fucking  _can_. Are you the litter police now or what?” 

Comebacks weren’t your forte, but you were feeling frisky. “Yeah. It’s people like you why the environment is fucking disastrous. Like, no wonder we have global warming.”

“Are- are you kidding?” he scoffed a derisive laugh, one side of his face lifting. “The world’s a fucking mess because of the demons and that bullshit portal the demon world that fucker opened up? It isn’t because of a goddamn can.”

“Pick it up!” you said, tone belligerent.

He gave you look from the side, lips taut in his attempt to refrain from fueling the argument any further. Even you had to admit it must have taken a hit to his pride when offered you his palms in submission, once again turning to get around to the passenger side.

Oh no. You weren’t having it.

With a huff, you swept the can into your hand and launched it at the back of his head. You heard Nico’s rancorous burst of laughter followed by an interval of smothered coughs as the can bounced off him and clanged on the ground. 

“Are you fucking kidding me?! What the hell?!” Nero touched the spot where the can struck, gaze flicking from your hard expression to the object. “Did you seriously just hit me with it?”

You rolled your neck and clicked your tongue. “Well, if you weren’t being such a little bitch, we wouldn’t be having this problem right now.”

“ _It’s a fucking can!_ ” his voice echoed, stirring the birds and scavenging rodents around him. 

Nico’s laughter became deafening as she hauled herself out of the van, teeth glistening against her sprawling grin. She raised her phone and quickly crouched several feet away, tilting her head with the angle of the phone.

“Mind doing that again? Wanna get this from another angle.”

Your expression was unreadable, though your eyes traveled from Nico towards the ground where the can was, and then finally dared to meet Nero’s gaze. He jabbed a robotic finger towards you in warning.

“Don’t.”

Being that you were the spiteful type, you scooped up the can and flung it straight into his face. His skin flushed red in anger while Nico was wheezing from laughter.


End file.
